I just saw a video that, I think, was supposed to make me call my mom or dad or both and reconcile.
The whole, you only get one __parent__ spiel.
I’m not with it.
The problem with what we’ve been taught about parents and, really, family in general is that we’ve been conditioned to see them as title first, human second. We’ve been taught that even if they torpedo our mental health, we owe them the benefit of the doubt and reconciliation because they were essentially assigned to us.
Basically, I’m supposed to disregard the fact that my father took my step sister up to my grandmother’s casket for the final viewing and left me, his only daughter and firstborn, at the back of the church (as he did also at his wedding) and that my mom and brother, as a unit, tried to jump me in my own apartment parking lot. Disregard what that did to my psyche altogether. That’s family. That’s “all I got”.
Let me be the first and loudest to say – sometimes it’s okay to have absolutely fckn nothing.
I’d rather be at peace with my brain than at peace with my family. Because too often recently, this brain has come at my neck with a razor-sharp blade. And where the hell was family?
Don’t deal with abuse of any type – mental, physical, emotional, intentional or unintentional – because of involuntarily-shared DNA. It’s more trouble than it’s worth.